Category: Uncategorized

  • The Pain That Never Ends

    Before the tragedies of this week even happened, I wrote a note. It feels like something is in the air causing distinct pain and hopelessness in people right now. I managed to avoid the psychiatric hospital only because we are leaving today for vacation. I doubt seriously vacation will help me feel any better, so…

  • How Quickly Life Moves On

    Two years ago, life for us nearly changed. You see, I have a disease. I have a mental illness. Multiple illnesses, actually. I suffer from bipolar depression, anxiety, PTSD and an eating disorder. On a warm June day, despite so many efforts, I nearly succumbed to my diseases. I was in therapy, receiving both conventional…

  • Technology and Mental Health

    When I was growing up, things like social media and having personal cell phones while in middle school didn’t yet exist. I had nothing to hide behind and who I was, was just that: me. But take a look at today’s social media. We have Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram and more that have the ability to…

  • Mental Illness Every Day

    A few days ago as I was digging through boxes in the garage looking for the yearly Christmas decorations, I stumbled upon a box of books. This box was filled with about 200 of my book that I wrote a few years back that I hadn’t sold at my speaking engagements. I picked one up…

  • I Am Me

    There’s a song lyric that speaks to my heart every time I hear it. It’s from former American Idol contestant, Danny Gokey. The words are: “Yesterday is a closing door, you don’t live there anymore. Say goodbye to where you’ve been, and tell your heart to beat again.” How often do we live in the…

  • What I really need when I tell you I’m struggling

    I’m going to be frank for a moment. I have several mental illnesses, chronic mental illnesses, which I will likely struggle with for the rest of my life. I take medications daily and I have electroconvulsive therapy weekly. I go to therapy, have a strong support system and a strong faith.  But, bad days will…

  • Inside The Mind of Mental Illness

    It’s as if I have a mood- system like the weather. It is independent of whatever is going on in my life. It doesn’t care if I have plans. Being bipolar means whatever I wake up to is what I have to live with. Once the smothering blanket of bipolar depression drops, it often seems…

  • A Letter to My Children

      HI kiddo,  how are you? I want to talk to you for a second because life isn’t always puppy dogs, sunshine, and smiles — because my life is rarely those things— and I want you to know why. After all, you deserve an explanation. You see, Mommy suffers from an illness. It’s different from…

  • Parenting with Mental Illness

    Mild anxiety and depression have always been a part of my life. I hid it well in my younger years; coping by using eating disordered behaviors to ease any feelings I didn’t like. I purged my food after binging while alternating that with periods of restricting my intake of food. As I got older, I…

  • Slipping

    I read an article today written by someone whose mom committed suicide and how Mother’s day just isn’t the same without her. In my heart I felt a sting. Because that’s one of my biggest fears- how my suicide would impact my children. My mental health has quietly been declining and yet I can’t seem…