I Am Me

There’s a song lyric that speaks to my heart every time I hear it. It’s from former American Idol contestant, Danny Gokey. The words are:

“Yesterday is a closing door,

you don’t live there anymore.

Say goodbye to where you’ve been,

and tell your heart to beat again.”

How often do we live in the past? I know I am guilty of this. I seem to overlook the life that is in front of me, instead spending too much time focusing on regrets of the past. Don’t get me wrong, decisions we’ve made in the past make up all of our life, so it’s hard to not think on them. But, there isn’t anything we can do to change the past. I sometimes dwell on all the wrongs I have committed and tear myself down, when it would benefit me so much more to focus on the blank slate ahead of me and how I can better myself, my family and those around me. I’ve wasted a lot of time being focused on the past and feeling like I just want to give up. But, I have so much in front of me if I will just focus on where I’m going instead of where I’ve been.

My calling is to be who I was meant to be. I can own and accept and embrace the fact that I am bipolar, that I’ve dealt with suicidality and that I’ve struggled with eating disorders. I live a life that is sometimes crippled by anxiety and depression.

I’m not supposed to be anything but true to who I really am.

And I am me.

I am not ashamed of that.

~Lindsay